A few days had passed and I was still in the hospital on the head trauma ward. During this time, one of the greatest challenges was trying to eat and keep the food down. I usually was only able to keep my meals down for about an hour or so. Each time I threw up, a new wave pain would surge through my head. That, plus the fact that moving my head was next to impossible, throwing up was becoming a real annoyance. So most of the time I opted out of eating (much to the nurses disapproval). I knew that I needed to eat to regain my strength but it just didn't seem worth the pain of puking an hour later. I am almost 100% sure that I was not a pleasant person to be around, but my mom continued to stay by my side. Some family friends were awesome enough to rent a room in a hotel for my mom to stay in the whole time I was in the hospital. Mom was there pretty much the whole time (and I know I wasn't the definition of kind and happiness at the time).
Two weeks later and I was going to be discharged (oh sweet freedom!). The only thing I had left to do was sign some paperwork, take my last batch of pain meds and get to the car. Paperwork was done, meds were on their way and I as an excited kid. Unfortunately, I was still having trouble swallowing, to make matters worse, they were out of ice cream or pudding. All they had left was peas and beans baby food (really? You think that after two weeks of puking up each meal I am going to able to stomach that?). Guess what… I didn't. Thirty minutes later a puked it all back up. And according to hospital policy, since I puked so close to discharge, I was required to stay another night for observation. I was not a happy and I didn't hold back my opinions about the situation. The next morning, I decided that I would take the pills whole instead of having them crushed. It was time to head home and see my best buddy (we gotten a Brittany Spaniel, Border Collie puppy in December and named him Simon. Awesome little dog!).
I was so happy to be home but walking and moving for that matter still really hurt. I was told that I would need to sleep in a recliner for the next two months and that I could not lay down flat at all until June. That was actually more of a challenge than I thought it would be. The recliner and I got to know each other quite well over the next few weeks. Some days it was all I could do to get up and take a shower, other days I would feel quite adventurous and shlep all the way to the kitchen for a drink (daring, I know!). Like I said, walking wasn't exactly easy or pain free but the doctors told me I needed to get a decent amount of "mild walking" (none of that crazy walking) throughout the day. Truth be told I would not have accomplished this task if it weren't for Simon. That cute little puppy was always there for me; and by that I mean running to the door wanting out, running to me to let me know he wanted out and then back to the door. So, I would grumble and hobble to the door. 3.2 minuets later and I could hear him whining at the door wanting in. So, again I would grumble and hobble to the door. Few minutes later he'd want back out. This pattern would go on several weeks and there were times I wanted to drop kick that puppy for his back and forth obsession, but in the long run I am really thankful. Little did I realize that I was walking more and more each day.
In April, I found out that the town of Meeker was holding a fundraiser for me. I was only able to stay for about ten minutes, but as I stood on the stage looking out at the town, I realized how truly lucky I was to live in such a town. The town of Meeker (collection cans included) had raised around $10,000 for my surgery. According to CHP+, our copay was ¼ of the cost. Which meant that the actual sugary was completely paid for. All my family was responsible for was hospital care. That was an amazing day and to say that I didn't get choked up on that stage would be a flat out lie.
It had been a month since my surgery and the cranial pressure was gone and most of my sight was back. I was slowly recovering and the pain was still there. Not the same pain as before, pain from the back of my head. The swelling was going down and I had a lot of visitors wanting to see the damage. After about a month in the recliner, I was begging my mom to let me lay down. I told her we didn't have to tell Dr B (it would be our little secret). Its amazing, when you are denied something as simple as "laying down" that seems to be all your brain thinks about. Eventually my body actually began to ache for the need just to lay down but as mom reminded me, that would probably not be a good idea. My symptoms seemed to continue to slowly leave, though light still messed with my eyes, it was nothing compared to what it use to be. I was sleeping all the time and my neck was still in pain but all seemed well. By the time graduation had come, I was feeling stronger that I had in April but I was still a long way from being back to 100%. I had survived surgery and I was graduating from high school. 2005 was looking like it was going to be a great year.
I was told that I should probably take a year off from school and working in order to allow my neck for heal fully. Needless to say, I watched a lot of movies that year, began physical therapy and seemed to be bouncing back. Also during that time I started physical therapy. At the time, I was considering physical therapy to be some sort of torture but secretly I was thrilled to be out of the house. I had watched my friends and classmates go on with their lives and on to school, I was feeling a bit left out. Physical therapy was a nice reprieve from everything at home. As part of my physical therapy, once I week my therapist would give me a deep tissue massage. If you have never had this type of massage, let me tell you that it is quite painful. They're not kidding about working the deep tissue and they have to work the muscles extremely hard to get there (first one I had, I was sitting there thinking "sweet, a neck massage, how awesome!" And then the therapist started. "Thats nice and it feels…. ow, ow OW! What are you doing? Stop it, that hurts! What did I ever do to you?" Then she says for me to just bear with her and she knows its painful. But after a while I thought to myself, "She has got to stop within the next 3 seconds or I might have to deck this very nice lady right in the face!"). But after a couple of weeks, the tissue starts to relax and then you start to crave the massages. It became the highlight to my week.
It was the fall of 2005 and there were a few symptoms that seemed to be hanging around. I figured that they would just fade in time. My eyes were still bugging me, I was having headaches every now and again, and my sleep was out of control. I figured that this was all due to the surgery and the physical therapy (but truthfully I was worried that I was still a slave to light and to sleep). Time passed and my eyes still hadn't quite full recovered but I was doing better than I had been in December of 2004. One crazy thing that changed in my life during recovery is that I had suddenly developed a sense of depth. Before, my world looked flat. My brain knew that the trees along the mountains stood up from the mountains, but when I looked at them, it looked like they all were laying flat against the mountain. My world had become a pop-up book and it was amazing.
It was February of 2006, I had worked a few jobs and was now preparing to go to college. I had applied to several colleges and all dropped my applications when I informed them I was going to have major surgery and would be out for another year. All that is except Colorado Mesa University (at that time is was still Mesa State College in none other but Grand Junction). They had called me before my surgery, told me they would keep my application pending until I was recovered and wished me good luck on the surgery. This had impressed me and I decided that this was the school I wanted to go to. I was going to school to be an artist, only problem was, I had lost my ability to draw. I had learned to draw with a lack of depth perception and with crossed eyes. Now that these were gone, I couldn't draw. I knew this would be an unpleasant obstacle but I was going to go to school for art, and that was final!
Sorry about the massive delay in posts. These past couple of weeks have been very busy. I went to see a new specialist down in Aurora and I think we may have an answer. They also have prescribed some pain meds to help ease the pain while we wait for the next appointment. So the past couple of weeks were filled with traveling and getting use to the new drugs. But I am getting ahead of the story. TBall
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